Portrait of a Godly Wife, Part 1

I have been reading a lot on who a Godly wife is. It is my desire to be one and to model that for my daughter, so I thought it would be a good idea to start a series on being a Godly wife as the lord works on my heart and changes it.  Please read on and feel free to comment and share revelations on who a Godly wife is and how God is working in your life in that regard.

Although there is a portrait in the bible of who a godly woman is (Prov. 31) I still wasn't sure who a Godly wife should be. Going in, I had several things going against me, first my expectations of who my husband should be and second, who I am as a wife. These two roles are influenced by the husband and wife roles I modeled as a child. If you were to ask me this a year ago, I would have denied that my parent's relationship influenced mine in anyway. Truth is it did, whether I acknowledge it or not. I am like my mother in many ways, strong, ambitious and hardworking. That coupled with my own controlling, perfectionist personality can be a lot to handle.

I am a take charge, get it done kind of person. I usually have a solution to a problem before I bring it up for discussion. On top of that I grew up in a home where my mother was the spiritual head of the home and she raised me accordingly. Fast forward to marriage life and I take the reigns in my own marriage in subtle ways, under the guise of  'helping'. In my mind, my way was better, so were my ideas and my expectations were reasonable.

All I did was focus on what my husband was either not doing my way or not doing at all. He did the dishes wrong so that they still had stains on them, he didn't pick his clothes up right away or wipe off the counter immediately when he spilled something. The list of things I found to gripe about is endless. This led to nagging and making him feel like he could never do anything right. I know what you are thinking, what a terrible wife! You are right in that assertion, it was my sin and I had to confess it and ask for forgiveness. It is so easy to fall into cursing him instead of blessing him though.

You may be thinking, isn't cursing him a bit much? No, not really when we consider some of the things we say about our husbands. Any sentence that begins with "You never.. " Or "You always..." and ends in negativity is a curse. I had to pray and release my husband of all the curses I had spoken into his life and bless him instead. I try to bless him daily. I say " my husband in a strong man of God and I bless him to come into better knowledge of who God is", "my husband is a loving father and a hardworking provider for our family". Initially it felt weird saying some of the blessings because some of them did not feel true, but what happened was, it opened a gateway of prayer for my husband.

If I had relied on my feelings alone, I would not have been able to pray for my husband as I should. Blessing him, opened my eyes to how God sees him. It also opened my eyes to who God truly wanted me to be in his life. I am to be his helpmate, a helper, made to be suitable for him. (Gen 2:18)